The Bald, the Fianna’s Provocateur
Conan Maol — “Conan the Bald” — was the Fianna warrior whose mouth was faster than his judgment. His insults and provocations appear throughout the Fenian Cycle, and he made almost every situation worse by his presence and more entertaining by his commentary. He was brave and cowardly in turns, sometimes within the same episode.
The baldness was not natural. The Fianna were once trapped in an Otherworld hall by magical adhesion — the floor held them stuck. When they were finally pulled free, Conan had to be torn away so violently that he left the skin of his back behind. Someone slapped a black sheepskin onto the exposed flesh. It stuck. He wore it for the rest of his life.
That is Conan: the great warrior who walked out of a supernatural adventure with a sheepskin permanently attached to his back. His physical grotesquerie was as distinctive as any hero’s weapon or wound, and unlike theirs, it was funny.
He said what no one else would say. He deflated pretension. He complained, insulted, provoked, and occasionally ran away. He was irritable, loud, embarrassing, brave enough to go anywhere, and reliably likely to make things worse. The Fianna was a better story for having him in it.
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